K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
it was like his penis was on wheels.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Randomize
