In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
you would pick up someone in the library
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
Randomize
