It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
