thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Randomize
