I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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