so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
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