so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
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