you win again, gameday.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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