her vagine was all disorganized.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Shame is for Republicans.
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