brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
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