Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize