Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
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