is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
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