I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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