I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
