Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
Randomize
