wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
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