can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Randomize
