I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
