I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Randomize
