Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
Randomize
