Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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