Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize
