I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
and she was petting her beer can
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
