I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize