i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
