Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
