She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
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