That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
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