Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I am naked and annoyed.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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