Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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