did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
