I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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