Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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