let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
