I didn't shave. On purpose
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
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