okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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