She went from zero to smokin in five shots
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Randomize
