Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
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