You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
