I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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