office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Randomize
