Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Randomize
