I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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