even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
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