she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
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this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
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Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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