i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Randomize
