i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
Randomize
