you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
Randomize
