turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Randomize
