gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
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